2 BEE or not 2 BEE..that is the question

Lovely poems to serenade your loved ones.....guarantee to work.....please memorise and use it as often as possible.....

*****************************************************
Roses are red, violets are blue
Monkeys like you should be kept in the zoo
Don't feel so angry, you will find me there too
Not in a cage but laughing at you
*****************************************************
Twinkle twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not that far
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The rain makes all things beautiful
The grass and flowers too
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why doesn't it rain on you?
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I wrote your name on sand it got washed away
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away
then ~ I wrote your name on my heart
And I got a heart attack straight away
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God saw me hungry, HE created Pizza
HE saw me thirsty, HE created Pepsi
HE saw me in dark, HE created light
HE saw me without problems, HE created YOU
*****************************************************

There, there, no need to thank me.....here wishing you and your loved ones happiness always.....

2 every1 his/her own

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WHY THE FUCK??? & WHAT THE FUCK!!!!

Sometimes I wonder WHY some people like the act as they do....????

Elaboration of WHY & WHAT THE FUCK is as below:

Example 1
Company A has been awarded a huge job...everyone in the company is happy and is parctically over the moon...albeit the tough period ahead. Then the Goon enters and starts to direct everyone to do this, do that, do this, do that....doesn't the S.O.B. knows that he is throwing a spanner into the works instead of helping!!! WHY THE FUCK????? WHHHHY? The best joke of all is that he doesn't even fucking know what the fuck he is supposed to do at all. Tell me the truth dear readers....do you guys attend a meeting acting like Mr. know-it-all and end up saying "I DON'T KNOW" to the client's face? HAHAHAHAHA...the Goon in question did that...the best part was this....the client came and ask the people working for company A WHY THE FUCK did the Goon attend the meeting in the first place? HOW THE FUCK was the people working for Company A supposed to know WHY THE FUCK the Goon came, fucked up everything and left? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Anwyays...there are lots more to come from this Goon....thats my personal guarantee...oooppsss...did I mention personal...shit! now everyone knows I attended that meeting as well....WHY THE FUCK did I go and do that? hmmmm I wonder....

Example 2
WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK is the Goon trying to accomplish by broadcasting internal matters to the general public? Doesn't he understands that he is dragging everyones face in the dirt as well....including himself? It's ok for himself cause he is a worthless shit anyway but why drag the whole company?

Does the Goon think that he can gain extra respect by doing so.....? I don't think so. I am contemplating whether or not to tell those involved WHAT THE FUCK exactly came out from the Goon's mouth.

Tell and everything will be busted and will sure be going to hell.....

Don't tell and I pity those involved...WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!

I know someday, the Goon is going to self destruct...self destruct in the sense that all of his shit will come out in the open. I personally got set up by this Goon a few years back and from there on I have been trying my FUCKING BEST to avoid him at all cost and paying additional premium for ASS INSURANCE.

Do you guys believe in repercussions? from God or otherwise. I DO....I believe repercussions exist and will happen....maybe not to the originator directly but maybe to his/her later generation ( kids maybe ). To those who know what/who I am babbling about should know that this Goon and his partner has mouths worse then a chicken's backside and dirtier than a whore's cunt.....its very sad to say that the repercussion did not befall them but to other innocent party ( notice the singularity of the word "party" ).

Anyway, FATE IS WHAT WE MAKE and let nature take it's course.

2 every1 his/her own....I rest my case...the case of the MOTHERFUCKING GOON who likes to fuck up everything and then leave...WHY THE FUCK doesn't he just disappear and WHAT THE FUCK will it take for him to disappear.

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Every1's a Clown in BOLEHLAND

Cut and Paste this from an email I received recently...better to do this instead of voicing out in my personal way....hehehe

Excerpt goes like this.......

To: Works Minister of Malaysia, Datuk Seri S. Samy Vellu ( Who the fuck is Samy? )

We, the undersigned, members of public and motorists in Klang Valley, Malaysia, wish to register our strongest protest against the latest announcement by the UMNO-led Government that toll will be increased in five main highways in Klang Valley with effective from 1st January 2007.

These five highways are Guthrie Corridor Expressway (GCE), Shah Alam Highway (KESAS), Damansara-Puchong Highway (LDP), Kuala Lumpur-Karak Highway and Cheras-Kajang Highway. ( what about the Tanjung Rambutan Highway? Should send the clowns there for a Brain Storming session )

The UMNO-led Government has signed concession agreements with the operator of these five highways i.e. Guthrie Corridor Expressway Sdn. Bhd., KESAS Sdn. Bhd., Lingkaran Trans Kota Sdn. Bhd., MTD Prime Sdn. Bhd. and Grand Saga Sdn. Bhd. and they are allowed to apply for review on toll charges after a certain period.

The recent 20%-60% toll rates hike must be condemned as it is of no difference from “highway robbery in broad daylight that sells out” the rights of motorists, consumers and ordinary Malaysians to big corporations, especially when the construction cost does not appear to justify the toll rates to be paid as follows:-

• RM 1.42 billion Lebuhraya Damansara-Puchong (LDP) with a concession period of 1996-2030, its toll rate rise from RM1 to RM1.60, an increase of 60 percent.
• RM 1.3 billion Kesas Highway with a concession period of 1993-2024, the toll rate increased from RM1.50 to RM2.20, a 46.7-percent hike.
• RM 336 million Cheras-Kajang Highway's with a concession period of 1995-2026, the toll rate increased by 30 cents - a hike of between 42.9 and 50 percent.
• RM 568 million Kuala Lumpur-Karak Highway with a concession period of 1994-2032, its toll rate increased between 20 and 25 percent; and
• RM 501 million Guthrie Corridor Expressway with a concession period of 2005-2035, its toll rate went up from RM1 to RM1.40 - a 40-percent increase.

We also wish to register our dissatisfactions over the toll hike when it is proven that the service quality provided by the concessionaires is unacceptable and unjustifiable for a toll hike. ( Yup....true very true....worse than Big Ear Holes )

Everyday, thousands of users of the highways often endure congestion at toll plazas which is a nightmare for motorists. It is outrageous that motorists in Klang Valley have to pay increased toll rates when there are in fact more traffic jams, poorer services and deterioration of roads on the highways. ( how I wish those motherfuckers try to travel without the use of Police Escorts......let them have a taste of what it is like to feel their balls boiling between their legs..if they have balls )

We also press for a full and complete review of such unfair privatization concession agreements, or demand that road tax be reduced to reflect the reduced financial commitments by the UMNO-led Government to building roads. ( 5 year planning....3 fucking years to build....use for 2 years and it becomes obselete....should shoot the motherfuckers for wasting the taxpayers moolah )

In September 2004, Works Minister, Datuk Seri Samy Vellu ( who the FUCK is this SAMY? somebody please tell me? I see his name mentioned here and there but till today I still DUNNO WHO THE FUCK IS HE!! ) said the UMNO-led Government had paid out RM 1.04 billion in compensation to highway concessionaires as part of efforts to offset toll increment over a five-year period from 1999. Therefore, we suggest that instead of keep on compensating these concessionaires untransparently in 5 to 6 years time in 2011 – 2013, it is more economically feasible to buy back the highways at cost, which would not only save the highway operators from going bankrupt, but also ensure a reasonable toll rate for all motorists as well as good service that is accountable to everyone.

We would like to remind the UMNO-led Government that they should not abuse the huge mandate given by the people to the UMNO-led Government during the last General Election. When the Prime Minister pledged for a clean, effective and people-oriented government, he must make sure he and his Cabinet really walk the talk. ( don't pin your hopes too high on this....MFs know how to talk only....a simple exercise of walking will always end up in the drain ).

Therefore, we also demand that the UMNO-led Government must respect public opinion by agreeing to a deferment of the unfair toll hike to allow for a full public study and understanding of its socio-economic and long-term implications of the toll hike.

For those who share the same aspirations with us, please also send this message to the relevant government authorities and highway concessionaires to protest against the unfair toll hike. Their telephone numbers and email addresses are as followed:

1. Guthrie Corridor Expressway: 603 - 6038 5052, 603 - 6038 5270, support@gce.com.my
2. KESAS Hotline: 603-5633 7188, email: mm@kesas.po.my
3. LDP Hotline: 603-7494 7333, 603-7494 7020, 603-7494 7000, email: info@litrak.com.my
4. MTD Capital: 603-6120 3322, 09-233 0100,
5. Grand Saga Hotline: 603-9075 0505
6. Dato Seri S. Samy Vellu, Ministry of Works, 603-27714004, menteri@kkr.gov.my
7. Dato' Syed Jamal bin Syed Jaafar, Secretary-General of the Ministry of Works, 603-27714020, SyedJamal@kkr.gov.my
8. Malaysia Highway Authority (Lembaga Lebuhraya Malaysia), 603-8737 3000 / 8738 3000, llm@llmnet.gov.my

Anyways, my personal opinion is that nothing will happen even if you write or call the above listed motherfuckers.....the best thing to do is to "accidentally" put a cross in the wrong box during the next Elections. No harm in having new faces and new management style for the next 4 years maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

Way to go BOLEHLAND...SUPPORT BN ( Bila Naik? ) for never ending Barang Naik!!!!!

Now I have to go and crack my freaking head to convince my Company to give me a 60% pay increase to offset the pending hike of the thousand odd things that I need to use and buy every fucking month!!!!

2 every1 his/her own..........Barang Naik allllllll the waaaaayyyyyy!!! FUUUUUCK!

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WHAT IRRITATES????

Been a while since my last post as was quite busy with my last job posting ( pls excuse the lame joke ) to Sudan. Neway, it's good to be back and am still trying to shake off the dreaded writers block.

Since the beginning of my time ( 30 odd years ), I have found that certain things really irritates and irks me off and its my pleasure to share it with you guys.....

Dribblers / Dribbling :-
Ever been in a situation where you go into a public/office toilet....head for the preferred urinal bowl....and ALAKAZAM! you see puddles of dribbles of some arsehole's urine on the floor....just exactly where you were going to adapt your pissing stance! WTF? don't dribblers know that they are not endowed with such long dicks as they think they might have? OR they have a dick with 3 holes....one for shooting in front and the other two for shooting left and right. HEY! aim and shoot straight for God's sake. Pity the cleaner who has to clean up after them....how I wish those dribblers get the same medicine. I also pity those mothers who has a dribbling son.....she has to clean up each and every time the bastard goes to toilet....maaaaan!

Wavey hands :-
That term is used for people who like to wave their hands just to let others know of their dislikes. This wavey hand thingy is best seen during a presence of a smoker ( I myself smoke ). Light up and they will start to put on their sorry looking fucked up faces, start waving their hands left to right as if to clear the air of some imaginary smoke thats choking them. Hey, WHAT THE FUCK! 100% of the smoking population out there knows that smoking will kill them someday dude....SO DOES BREATHING IN CARBON MONOXIDE smart ass! for those wavey hands S.O.B.s out there, Carbon Monoxide is the no odour gas that you guys are breathing in thru your fucking noses every fucking day! and its emitted by the burning of gasoline/petrol/diesel/petrol....u wavey hands know what that means? that means to stop Carbon Monoxide poisoining and to make you motherfuckers live longer, we have to stop using our vehicles, planes, tanks, your mother's car and everything thats using gasoline/petrol/diesel/benzine. My advice to those wavey hands is...please go fuck your own mother/father for starting up their cars in the morning before showing the world that you are choking because of some so called 2nd hand smoke. Yes, no doubt that 2nd hand smoke will kill you ( I do not deny that fact ) but so does every other fucking gas that you are breathing thru your nose...or do the wavey hands breath thru their arse? 100% of the population is health consious nowadays...not just the wavey hands...so just FUCK OFF the next time you see people lighting up OR just stick a fucking Tampon up your fucking nose. Just to let you guys in on a secret k? you know what I will do if I see a wavey hands near me when I light up? I will purposely exhale smoke so that they get a whiff of it. won't do it if they start don't waving their hands...no waving of hands...no exhaling of smoke in their direction...hey, I am a considerate bugger too...very fucking proud to say that my mum taught me well ( except for the smoking part ). So, fuck off far, far, far away wavey hands...go wave your hands at your own ass for all we smokers care....and don't ever fucking wave your freaking hands at me.....see u in HELL!

Names :-
Whats in a name? PLENTY I must say! Your name is you, your personality, your character, your goodname and your reputation. Spoil a bowl of broth is ok but if you spoil your name then you're fucked big time!

Ever came across some buggers with weird names? e.g. Kinky, Horny and such? I saw an ad the other day posted at one of those stalls you see at the supermarket, it reads " Sales Assistant Wanted. Please call Kinky Chong at 01x-xxxxxxx"...HAHAHAHAHA! Kinky? I know that his/her mother got Kinky before they got him...I was laughing my head off and my wife was also laughing along with me. Hey, to have a unique name is ok but not downright weird and obsene. I have an aquaintance who named his daughter "Khatulistiwa" ( Equator ) ...HAHAHAHA..WTF? Equator? why? He wants his daughter to grow up to be "Hot" is it? You can also find lots of funny, weird and foolish names at the Hong Kong Film Star directory....names like Kinky, Rain, Sky, Fish will all appear....by the way, Fish Leong is a Malaysian singer..FISH? HAHAHAHAAHAHAHA! what kind...puffer fish? blow fish? well she is welcome to give me a good blow if she wants to.

I can list and list the things that I consider irritating but it will take up too much e-space. Please feel free to insert your comments on the things that ticks you off dudes and dudettes.

2every1 his/her own!!!!

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WANT A RAISE?

It's that time of year again....time of good tidings, drinking, partying, bonuses and with the hope of a good raise from our bosses. Below is an excellent example of what NOT TO SAY when requesting for a raise from your boss ( it also shows their expected replies ):

Read, learn and enjoy...........

I, the Penis ( meaning you ), hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge head first into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.


Dear Penis ( thats you ):

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised,the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stayin your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

And if that were not enough, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the work place carrying two suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,
The Management


WTF!!? to every1 his/her own.....have a Super Duper Merry Christmas and a Wonderfully Happy New Year...and may the year 2007 bring everything thats good to you and blah, blah, blah, blah...........

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