WANT A RAISE?

It's that time of year again....time of good tidings, drinking, partying, bonuses and with the hope of a good raise from our bosses. Below is an excellent example of what NOT TO SAY when requesting for a raise from your boss ( it also shows their expected replies ):

Read, learn and enjoy...........

I, the Penis ( meaning you ), hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labor.
I work at great depths.
I plunge head first into everything I do.
I do not get weekends or public holidays off.I work in a damp environment.
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.
I work in high temperatures.
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.


Dear Penis ( thats you ):

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised,the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.
You fall asleep after brief work periods.
You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
You do not stayin your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.
You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.
You will retire well before you are 65.
You are unable to work double shifts.
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

And if that were not enough, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the work place carrying two suspicious looking bags.

Sincerely,
The Management


WTF!!? to every1 his/her own.....have a Super Duper Merry Christmas and a Wonderfully Happy New Year...and may the year 2007 bring everything thats good to you and blah, blah, blah, blah...........